Weekly Communiqués

Tuesday December 14, 2004
Well, this will be my last entry and on the one hand I will greatly miss being able to share my thoughts with you all, but on the other hand, this means that Charl is almost home! A mixed Blessing!
Nine months and 8 days ago, Charl set sail from Palacios. Watching him sail away that morning was devastating for me. Throughout the months of preparation, I would wake up at night, turn to look at him lying next to me and secretly wonder if these would be the last nights I would share with him. I did not know how I would feel when he sailed away, I did not know how I would manage when he was gone. I remember cherishing every moment I had with him and how I hated to share him with Island Time! But the work on the boat had to be done and though I understood that, I wished for any kind of delay. Poor Charl, his Khama must have been tugging at both ends!
Saturday March 6th - the beginning of a historic journey and magnificent adventure. Little did I know, when I stood in front of the altar 20 years ago, that my young farmer would be the first deaf man to attempt a solo circumnavigation. Our daily prayers at that time were for the Limpopo to flood and for rain so that we could have a good cotton yield.
Those first days after his departure were the most difficult of all. The empty bed, the changed routine, the loneliness. Why is it that when one is lonely there is absolutely no yearning to go out and seek company. Perhaps that is not the same for everyone, but it was for me.
Just a week after Charl left, we knew that Dad would have to have his leg amputated. Many hours at the hospital brought a different kind of fearful anticipation. I found myself looking at Daddy at night wondering if these would be the last days with him. Oh my heart was broken. How could I possibly cope with all the fear and anticipation and responsibility. It all seemed too much to carry. The loss of my Father was like a death blow to my soul. Just 6 months ago, today. Christmas is going to be difficult.
Charl had passed through the Panama Canal and was being tormented in the Pacific by the heat, the loneliness and the calms mixed with the whipping squalls. I needed him home, but the Seas had won, they shared his company. Oh how I prayed that they would not keep him and that I would get him back. I knew I could not manage losing another Love.
Pago Pago - a place of safety and rest turned evil. I will never be able to put into words the panic and fear that consumed me when there was no message from Charl for those few days. Thank you Lord that the children were both home as it was Summer.
The meeting in Australia was bitter sweet. The moment I saw him waiting there for us I felt as though I was floating! Just to see him and hold him and hear his voice was like being wrapped safely in a warm blanket. How quickly the days passed and then he was gone again. The Indian Ocean held as much danger and terror as did the Pacific. Squall after squall. IT and her captain just thrashed and pounded at all hours of the day and night. IT held her head high and this courageous little boat with its captain, injured a little, limped to the safety of Rodriguez Island. Just a little welding required - what an amazing boat she is.
My trip to South Africa was good for me. Visiting old friends and my school and University and traveling the width of the country by bus in just a week was great. I think I am at peace with the changes there now. Change brings the birth of a new beginning and I pray with all my heart that my country of birth will find peace and prosperity and happiness for all her people.
Leaving Cape Town and watching Charl walk away from the airport tore at my heart once again. I still see his face as he turned one more time to look back at me. Would that be my last look into those beautiful eyes?
The Atlantic Ocean has been kinder in a way. Perhaps I just think that because it is the last Ocean to cross and Charl now has so much experience to fall back on.
On Saturday or Sunday, just five days from now, all this will be over. Charl will sail in on IT as proud as can be and my heart will burst with pride.
This has not been easy. By nature and with many blessings, I am a strong person who walks with the Lord, but I am human too and this time has changed me. I no longer feel that, no matter what, I can see all things through alone. I no longer have the answers to, or the motivation to cope with the problems that have arisen since Charl's departure. This is a state of mind that I will need to work on, in God's time.
I am excited and nervous and thrilled and proud and just about every emotion that you can think of! He is not home yet, so I try and contain myself and pray even harder that nothing should happen to him or IT now. I can hear the excitement in his voice as I read his logs and his story of IT. How proud he must be of her. How proud I am of her and I will love her forever as she will be bringing my Love home again!
For anyone who may be reading this letter and does not walk with a Maker - I will pray for you. Without mt Faith and my Lord, I know that I would never have had the courage to go to work each day, try and solve the problems or cope with the emptiness in my home. A closer walk with God, this I have experienced and it has greatly enriched my soul and given me a deeper understanding of the important things in life. I am at peace with many issues that I had as a person and I eagerly look forward to a new beginning when Charl gets home.
"Dear Father God. You have been my strength and my teacher throughout this ordeal. Thank you, thank you. My prayer is that you have touched Charl's heart too and that he will be at peace within himself and find the happiness that only You can bring. You have held him in Your hand, just as I asked. You have placed Your Angels on the bow, just as I asked. If I ever doubted it before, I know now that You always keep Your promise. How Great Thou art. Today I go down on my knees, your humble servant. Let me follow You always."
It is time to say goodbye. I have enjoyed this time with you all and thank you for sharing your love and prayers with me. I feel as though I have made so many good friends. Please be my friends for ever!
To my Mom - you are so strong, I have learned much from you this year. Thank you for being the incredible person you are.
Sharleen and Gideon - how proud I am of you. What great young people you are. What an example you set for others. It gives me peace to know that you too walk with the Lord. Stay close to Him and you will never fail.
To Charl - you are a courageous man. You are a man with dreams and great achievement in life. I am so proud to be your wife. Now is the time to stop and smell the roses! I love you with all my heart.
God Bless each and every one
I love you. God loves you.
Bev, Sharleen, Gideon and Mom

Tuesday December 14, 2004
Saturday December 4, 2004
Saturday November 27, 2004
Saturday November 6, 2004
Saturday October 23, 2004
Saturday October 16, 2004
Saturday October 9, 2004
Friday October 1st - Charl's Arrival in Cape Town
Thursday September 30, 2004
Saturday September 25, 2004
Saturday September 18, 2004
Saturday September 11, 2004
Saturday September 4, 2004
Sunday August 29, 2004
Saturday August 21, 2004
Saturday, August 14, 2004
Saturday August 7, 2004
Saturday July 31, 2004
Saturday July 24, 2004
July 10 and 17
Saturday July 3, 2004
Sunday June 28, 2004
Sunday June 20, 2004
June 12, 2004
Saturday June 5, 2004
Saturday May 28, 2004
Saturday May 22, 2004
Saturday May 15, 2004
Saturday May 8, 2004
May 1st, 2004
April 24, 2004
April 17, 2004
Saturday, April 10, 2004
Saturday, April 3, 2004
Satuday March 27, 2004
Sunday March 21 2004
Week One
Message from Bev - Saturday March 6, 2004